At the beginning of October we helped move my parents out of their home of 28 years. When our family of five first moved into this home, my siblings and I were just young kids. It's the only home we were raised in and it's the only home we truly remember living in. 28 years later, as we prepared to say goodbye, I found myself watching my sister and (pregnant) sister-in-law playing with my niece in the front yard, my brother preparing to drive the last truck out of the driveway, my parents ensuring the last little things are done and the door is locked, all while I was laying in the grass and taking pictures of my childhood home.
A few minutes before, we had been cleaning the floors and walking through the halls of that house for the last time, and I began to ponder the many happy memories that one has in a loving childhood home. When I woke up the next morning and began to reflect in the morning "quietness" (which, if we're honest, is never really quiet with three young kids) of my own home about this move, what adventure awaited my parents, and on the cherished memories that we had in those four simple walls, I began to think, "This is success. This is what it looks like, this is what it feels like."
We so often define success by a promotion, monetary gain, social status, church size, nice cars etc…Success is not defined by an object or the monetary things in life, it is defined by being steady and consistent. Success is my mom sitting at the bottom of our staircase every night with my sister and me, talking to us about our goals, struggles, or lives for anywhere from 5 minutes until the wee hours of the morning. No matter how tired she was, she always sat there as long as we’d talk; listening, and engaging with us. Then she would pray for us a simple, heartfelt prayer and send us up to bed.
Success is walking down the stairs as a young girl late at night or early in the morning and turning right into my dad's office to find him in a worn down, golden yellow velvet chair with his lamp on reading his Bible. Success is in the safety I'd find crawling into his arms, interrupting his alone time and laying in his lap a moment.
I saw the scuff on the wall and remembered where I fell down the stairs and broke a staircase spindle after running too fast down the stairs and falling...success is in the stable loving home, even if the walls are scuffed by children and you've had to replace broken spindles.
I looked at my parents manicured lawn and remembered the swing set fort that my dad build with his own two hands for me and my siblings to play on, the countless friends we had over and the hours upon hours spent playing in the yard he kept, and the flowerbeds my mom would mulch with her irises blooming in the early summer...success.
I've begun viewing success differently these days. Success to me is now defined by the steady and consistent ways of life. Success in my marriage looks like the coffee David so kindly in consistently brews me each morning while I get our children ready for school. Success in our house looks like our own family of five dancing in the kitchen while Alexa plays “Here Comes The Sun” and our dog Ruby barks at us. Success in our walk with Christ looks like my husband kneeling in worship and my daughter whispering in my ear “Daddy is having a moment with Jesus”.
Success in our ministry looks like David and I partnering together and being on the same page as we follow the heart of our Father. Success in our finances looks like the gracious consistency of a paycheck and the ability to bless others while God has provided and taken care of all our needs. Success in our children looks like when they are angry or hurt they run to us to be their calm space and dry their tears.
Success in my childhood home wasn’t found in updated appliances, brand new cars in the driveway, or marble counter tops. It was me and my siblings posing on the stairs to recreate a nearly 30 year old photo after helping my parents for the past two weeks pack and load up their home. It was a united family with Godly parents smiling as we stood on the front lawn as the Sanders 5 and took a goofy photo. It was being dog tired after attending church that morning and then going to help each other out as we unloaded the last few items off of the moving truck. It is our family, with spouses and kids sprawled everywhere, soaking wet after a downpour eating In And Out at 10 PM in a delusional, tired state discussing the Cowboys game we didn’t watch.
I can’t help but think of the Good Father we serve, what attributes I love most about Him, and what makes Him a good God to serve. This is where I am at in this season, this is the facet of Him I love the most right now. He is faithfully steady and consistent, we can fully trust in Him as our Savior. Despite the scuffs on the walls and worn down fence, success is defined in our souls by so much more. He desires us to prosper in our mind, will, and emotions. He is our “ever present help in time of need” (Psalms 46), and although we might just see an old run down house that we think doesn’t have much to offer, He see’s the child he knew before he formed in your mother's womb (Jeremiah 1:5) who is growing, falling, learning, and moving closer to eternity with Him.
Success in life cannot defined by dictionary and it can't be truly defined by words. Success is found in living a steady life before God, in both service to Him and in service to others.
Success looks and feels like this: being steady and consistent throughout the ebbs and flows of life.
By Grace,
Shellby